It was a warm sunny unsuspecting Sunday evening when I am startled by the sudden burst of my wife through the door. Gasping for air she blurts out, "THE MORMONS!" followed by frantic closing of the blinds because our living room window goes out into the parking lot where the lurking Mormons were waiting. They were talking to some poor fool who was trying to move, and apparently, find Jesus at the same time.
And waited, until we were certain the Mormons had left. Then we foolishly opened the blinds to let in the sunshine and not more than 30 seconds after, the Mormons walked by and saw my wife and I through the window. "SHIT" Nikki blurts out and runs to the bedroom.
I stood firm and awaited their beckoning knock. Knock, Knock. Even though I tried to prepare myself, I wasn't nearly ready, mentally. I answered to two younger looking men with a smile from ear to ear. "Hi" the obviously dominate of the two says enthusiastically. "Hello" I said with a slight squint in my eye. I neglected to allow them entry into my house so the rest of the conversation was held in the doorway.
The Mormon initiate then explained to me that they were out talking to people about Jesus. He ended his spiel with a question, "So, have you accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?"
"Actually, no" i replied, "I don't believe in god." the quiet mormon was taken aback like he had never heard such blasphemy. The second one responded, "Oh, may I ask why?" to which I calmly responded, "because I have an education."
Now I didn't mean for it to come out the way it sounded and I hope they weren't offended but I'm sure they were cursing me under their breath. Then I fumbled around trying to not sound so snooty about it. "Well, I mean, I am a biologist and I took lots of evolutionary biology classes and in my mind the two don't really mesh very well. The bolder of the two mormons swung his crooked are through the air as if to say we'll get 'em next year. As he did this motion he said, "darn that science." he continued, "Well do you mind if I give you some pamphlets!"
Which I took.